The Power of a Song

It's amazing that something as seemingly simple as music can have so much impact in our lives. Pop in Def Leopard or Bon Jovi and I'm instantly in middle school again. Pearl Jam, Tom Petty, and the Chili Peppers conjure images of my college days. A song carries with is so much more than just some lyrics and some instruments. For most people, a song can bring back memories that were long forgotten. In some cases a song heard when one is at a crossroad can have the power to change lives.

Flowers are Red
by Harry Chapin

The little boy went first day of school
He got some crayons and started to draw
He put colors all over the paper
For colors was what he saw
And the teacher said..
What you doin' young man
I'm paintin' flowers he said
She said... It's not the time for art young man
And anyway flowers are green and red
There's a time for everything young man
And a way it should be done
You've got to show concern for everyone else
For you're not the only one

And she said...
Flowers are red young man
Green leaves are green
There's no need to see flowers any other way
Than they way they always have been seen

But the little boy said...
There are so many colors in the rainbow
So many colors in the morning sun
So many colors in the flower and I see every one

Well the teacher said..
You're sassy
There's ways that things should be
And you'll paint flowers the way they are
So repeat after me.....

And she said...
Flowers are red young man
Green leaves are green
There's no need to see flowers any other way
Than they way they always have been seen

But the little boy said...
There are so many colors in the rainbow
So many colors in the morning sun
So many colors in the flower and I see every one

The teacher put him in a corner
She said.. It's for your own good..
And you won't come out 'til you get it right
And are responding like you should
Well finally he got lonely
Frightened thoughts filled his head
And he went up to the teacher
And this is what he said.. and he said

Flowers are red, green leaves are green
There's no need to see flowers any other way
Than the way they always have been seen

Time went by like it always does
And they moved to another town
And the little boy went to another school
And this is what he found
The teacher there was smilin'
She said... Painting should be fun
And there are so many colors in a flower
So let's use every one

But that little boy painted flowers
In neat rows of green and red
And when the teacher asked him why
This is what he said.. and he said

Flowers are red, green leaves are green
There's no need to see flowers any other way
Than the way they always have been seen.

A few years ago, when my oldest son was in the fourth grade, we were having a really hard time with his teacher. She believed in conformity, only she called it "community." She didn't seem to appreciate Toby's own personal drummer. In fact, she seemed downright determined to bash that drum into oblivion. I came to a point when I realized this was not a good environment for Toby to be in, but I thought maybe we could make it to the end of the year. I was dealing with a good bit of inner turmoil centered on balancing my commitments with my son's needs.

In the middle of all of this turmoil, a friend sent a copy of Harry Chapin's lyrics to me. When I read the final verse, I was crushed. I realized the damage that my son was enduring could become permanent. I realized his needs vastly outweighed any commitments I believed I had. First and foremost, my commitment was to him. I turned in my resignation and his withdrawal the next day.

Two years later, I am still trying to undo the damage a little bit each day. Just today, I had to remind him that I actually want his opinion when I ask him a question, rather than what he thinks I want to hear. I get a little more of my boy back each day. I'm just glad I was able to change his environment while he could still see most of the colors.